traynors:

you dont just play the sims. you go on a sims binge for three days straight then put the game down for 5 months

dude so i was roller skating today and i fell on my butt and now i have a decent sized scrape on my thigh and it hurts cos i keep forgetting about it ;-;

bombing:

[tries to crowd surf at a TED talk]

laserelectric:

can you imagine how fucking relieved the french must have been when we reached the year 2000? 

they went from having to say “mille neuf cents quatre-vingt-neuf” to just having to say “deux mille” to say the year

(Source: wingedpikmin)

Dude I’m so angry my sis and my parents and I are sharing a hotel room and my dad is snoring up a storm and I can’t sleep cos I keep covering my ears with my pillow but it’s hot so I need to be free from like anything on my face and yeah I’m extremely unset because I’m super tired but his snoring is absolutely terrible